It is 3 in the morning and here I am doing a meme.

Somehow, this will either terrify me or send me into hysterics.

Choose twelve characters from your fandoms, then answer the questions under the link. Do not look at the questions beforehand!

Hm. This is a problem. I don't check in to many fandoms.

1. Crowley (Good Omens)
2. Aziraphale (Good Omens)
3. Auron (FFX)
4. Lulu (FFX)
5. Sirius (Harry Potter)
6. Remus (Harry Potter)
7. Daenerys (A song of Ice and Fire)
8. Sam Vimes (Discworld)
9. Zhang He (Dynasty Warriors)
10. Havelock Vetinari (Discworld)
11. Dream (The Sandman)
12. Lu Meng (Dynasty Warriors)

7-12 are just there to fill space.

The Questions.

1. Who would make a better college professor, 6 or 11? What subjects would they teach? (Remus, Dream)

Hm. They’d both do something arty such as literature, but I say Dream would be the better, stricter, teacher due to his dedication. Remus however, would probably be more approachable.

2. Do you think 4 is hot? How hot? (Lulu)
Ah. Um. Uh. Oh screw. She is hot, yes. Especially in the character art depiction. In game however, it looks like her chest is about to escape the constraints of her dress and bounce all over the place.

3. 12 sends 8 on a mission. What is it, and does it succeed? (Lu Meng, Vimes)
Probably send him off to go slaughter Wei at that castle, the name of which escapes me. Vimes wouldn’t be too happy about it, seeing Lu Meng’s disastrous track record and he would go about it in his own way. Whether he succeeds or not depends on whether he has his beloved Watch with him. If he does, then he will most likely succeed. If he doesn’t.. then probably not, although you never know with Vimes.

4. What is or would be 9's favorite book? (Zhang He)
Aw hell naw. It’ll either be something like “Sex” by Madonna or something intellectual. I can see him reading “Anna Karenina” somehow.

5. Would it make more sense for 2 to swear fealty to 6, or the other way around? (Aziraphale, Remus)
It wouldn’t make much sense either way, unless the both of them plan to take over the world in an old-fashioned, bookish sort of way.

6. For some reason, 5 is looking for a roommate. Should s/he share a studio apartment with 9 or with 10? (Sirius, Zhang He, Vetinari)
Honestly, I have no idea. He might go for Zhang He as Zhang He’s more fun to be around with in an odd sort of way. Vetinari would probably start creeping him out. The other alternative is that he gives up and goes camping with James.

7. 2, 7 and 12 have dinner together. Where do they go, and what do they discuss? (Aziraphale, Daenerys, Lu Meng)
Strange bedfellows indeed. They’d go to a quaint English restaurant on Aziraphale’s urging, (for he is very good at that) and Daenerys and Lu Meng would discuss the best ways to conquer a country with Aziraphale making polite conversation on the side. If they don’t get drunk, all is well and they go their separate ways. If they do get drunk.. expect gibberish about dragons. (Verr’ big, um whatyoucallems. Flappy things.)

8. 3 challenges 10 to a duel; what happens? (Auron, Vetinari)
I can’t see Auron challenging Vetinari to a duel, because he is smarter than that, and even if he does, I do not expect Vetinari to take up the challenge. There wouldn’t be much of a point, really, Vetinari would just.. arrange things.

9. If 1 stole 8's most precious possession, how would 8 get it back? (Vimes)
Oh boy, I’m fucked. Not in the literal sense of course. Um. He would be very angry, more so than usual, discover where my super secret hiding place is, get his possession back, and then arrest me.

10. Suggest a title for a story in which 7 and 12 both attain what they most desire. (Daenerys, Lu Meng)
How to conquer the Continent within 80 days. Or something similar.

11. What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted 4 and 1 to work together? (Crowley, Lulu)
Um. I’d have to go with the “SAVE THE WURLDZ!!” one sadly, since both of them have done so already. Either that or they have to beat back the advancing horde of pink fluffy, zombie rabbits. That will get any two people, no matter how different or how much they loathe each other, to work together.

12. If 7 visited you for the weekend, how would you get along? (Daenerys)
Her dragons would torment my cats and I wouldn’t like that. Apart from that, I’d be polite and show her around the place, making sure the dragons stay somewhere else.

13. If you could command 3 to perform any one task or service for you, what would it be? (Auron)
To go back in time and make the writers change the ending of FFX, OR to make sure that FFX-2 never happened.

14. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw 11? (Dream)
Yes.

15. If 2 had to choose sides between 4 and 5, which would it be? (Aziraphale, Lulu, Sirius)
Aziraphale wouldn’t pick sides. He’d just soothe things between the two and offer some tea.

16. What might 10 shout while charging into battle? (Vetinari)
Vetinari? Charge? Ahahahahahaha.

17. If you chose a song to represent 8, which song would you choose? (Vimes)

Karma Police. Vimes is a policeman, Karma has “police” in it. Hurr hurr.

I honestly have no idea.

18. 1, 6, and 12 are having dim sum at a Chinese restaurant. There is only one scallion pancake left, and they all reach for it at the same time. Who gets to eat it? (Crowley, Remus, Lu Meng)
Crowley would get it. Remus is too polite, and Lu Meng would be scared off by the weird things Crowley can do with his tongue.

19. What might be a good pick-up line for 2 to use on 10? (Aziraphale, Vetinari)
Um. Ah. Uh.

…

Next question.

20. What would 5 most likely be arrested for? (Sirius)
>_>.

In real life? Either for being a public nuisance, or for indecent, public displays of affection.

21. What is 6's secret? (Remus)
Hee hee. Bad thoughts in my head.

22. If 11 and 9 were racing to a destination, who would get there first? (Dream, Zhang He)
Dream, most definitely. He’s one of the Endless man! He can do anything.

23. If 1 and 5 were stuck in an elevator together, what would happen? (Crowley, Sirius)
If they are not drunk, they will fidget, look around nervously, and engage in small talk. If they are both drunk, hilarious conversations will ensue, and they will eventually end up swapping snogging notes.

24. 1 (Crowley) and 9 (Zhang He) reluctantly team up to save the world from the threat posed by 4's (Lulu’s) sinister secret organization. 11 (Dream) volunteers to help them, but it is later discovered that 11 (Dream) is actually a spy for 4 (Lulu). Meanwhile, 4 (Lulu) has kidnapped 12 (Lu Meng) in an attempt to force their surrender. Following the wise advice of 5 (Sirius), they seek out 3 (Auron), who gives them what they need to complete their quest." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.
”Mega-epic Crossover adventures, read only when high or Drunk.” Unfortunately, I think Wynne, Tiff and Ele would read it just to see what the hell’s going on. No one should write this, ever, for it is worse than that crack dream I had that involved Drow, FFX, The Simpsons, Fish, Maplestory, Counter-strike, The Wheel of Fortune and Rollercoasters.

25. If you had to walk home through a bad neighbourhood late at night, would you feel safer in the company of 7 or 8? (Daenerys, Vimes)
If in Ankh-Morpork, Vimes. If in the generic “bad part of town”, any one of them would be alright, although Daenerys wins in the end due two her three fricking fire-breathing dragons.